Footsteps of eternity

Footsteps of eternity

Lifeless you lay,
at the bottom of the ocean,
unable to swim,
you suffocate in your own weeping.
All I want to do,
is to rock you like a baby,
in My mighty arms,
comforting you in your grieve.

Lullabies are no answers,
to questions deep within,
but distractions,
that keep you from living.

All I want for you is to live,
a life beyond your dreams.
All I want for you is to love,
a love that is true and genuine.
Remember My child,
that there is no greater love,
that He who gave it up for His friends!

The sand in the hourglass,
has almost past the hours of waiting.
The mirror only shows you dimly now,
but soon you will see the full picture.
Soon the past will be a dissolved mirage,
holding the future in your sight,
and the present in your heart.

The things you are longing for now,
they will dissolve like misty air,
on a bright summer day.
You and I will be one,
unable to ever part again,
and the rest of the journey,
we will walk hand in hand.

My child,
I know how much you miss me,
how much your heart aches for me.
But remember that I am always with you,
Your heart is my home,
where I will always reside in.

Keep fighting for Me,
keep walking towards My light,
knowing the victory is ours.
Don’t walk in the footsteps of the world,
but rather choose the footsteps of eternity,
where I will be waiting,
on the steps of your dreams.

Wipe your tears away My love,
and smile like the rising of the sun,
that illuminates everything.
I hold you in the palm of My hands,
not even allowing your foot to stumble.
I have counted all the hairs on your head,
I have created you in My deepest love.

The sense of your existence lays in Me,
for I wanted you,
longed for you,
created you,
loved you with an everlasting love,
and I will keep loving you,
until the end of time.

I am with you,
I am for you,
and I am around,
all the days of your life,
until eternity!

Footsteps of eternity

 

There is no partiality with God!

Last night I was reading Romans 2. When I got to the eleventh verse, I felt so touched

‘For there is no partiality with God’.

You may know by now that my life was far from easy. I have never really spoken about what happened because I don’t want to hurt the people that hurt me. This may sound weird, but it is something that God taught me. One day, a couple of years ago, I wanted to write my story down for all the wrong reasons. I wanted others to feel a grain of the pain I felt all those years. But God said to me, “Gineke, there are those that hurt you because they really wanted to but there are also those that hurt you because they got hurt first. They hurt you out of their own brokenness. If you tell your story, you will hurt them all over again. Don’t take revenge”! That day I decided that my story would not be told. Or at least the names of the people who hurt me, nor how they are related to me (whether family, friends or aqcuaintances), would ever be told. But I will say this. I was yelled at, laughed at, excluded, rejected, ridiculed and hurt. The worst thing that was ever said to me was that I was worthless.

Because of my past I have several issues among which a generalized anxiety disorder and a negative self-image. It is something I have been battling for years. Especially when nothing in life seems to go to plan, I mentally punish myself even when it is not my fault. I am literally my own worst critic. When I have these depressive moods, it shows especially in my prayers. I ask God what is wrong with me and on rare days, I even ask God why He still loves me because He is better off without me. In my own view God could better replace for somebody else because everybody is better than me. This sounds worrisome but the past has left some ugly scars that hurt from time to time. I have had numerous therapists, including EMDR, but nothing worked so far. I have prayed countless prayers for myself but none of them were answered.

So, when I read that verse last night, it felt like lightning on a blue sunny day. Too many people have rejected me and because of that I Always feel as if everybody else is Always better than me. I am never good enough. But don’t we all feel this way? Don’t we all feel either better or worse than somebody else? Whether it is in religion of our jobs, our family our character, we feel better or worse than others. But God does not!!!

God looks at us without judgement. He loves us all equally, regardless of who we are, what we have done or what we look like. Like God told Samuel in 1 Samuel 16:7,

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at his physical stature, because I have refused him. For the Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

Samuel was at the house of Jesse to anoint the new King. When Jesse sons were presented, Samuel judged them the way he saw them. One look strong, the other intelligent and another handsome. But God reminded Samuel that the heart is more important that the outward appearance. God had chosen David. A young shepherd boy. The one who looked least like a future King.

For us it works the same way. We look at other the way we see them. We put them on a pedestal and praise them for their beauty, outstanding work, amount of charity, their ministry, their prayer life etc. But God reminds us that this is all just outward appearance. None of us is better than the other. People may look almost perfect, but they have issues that we know nothing about. They are not better than us, but they are just like us.  Isn’t that beautiful? Instead of punishing ourselves for not being good enough we may remind ourselves that God loves us so much and with God there is no partiality. In God’s eyes we are beautiful, unique, created by Him and dearly loved by Him.

So, the next time when I feel down. The next time when my past reminds me that I am never good enough. I only must remind myself that with God there is no partiality. God loves me and that’s the truth.

God loves you and accepts you the way you are, even when you find it hard to accept yourself. Do you believe that?

If you need prayer, maybe because you have a negative self-image as well or because you feel hurt, let me know. You can do this via a contact form (this way I get an email and it is all private) or you may write it below this message. You are not alone! You are loved by Jesus!

Romans 2 11

God is Love

God is Love

Love’s divine kiss,
has chosen you,
as the receiver,
to be its guardian.

Protected love has the ability,
to shower blessings of rain,
into a desert of drought,
making flowers grow,
out of nothing.

Love as the most powerful weapon,
is the foundation for many fruit,
for its soil is rich in Jesus,
and its strength flows from the Holy Spirit,
guiding you as your main messenger.

Love holds you close to His heart,
keeping you as a valuable treasure.
The look of love melts every eye,
overwhelms every soul with joy.

Love is the creator of possibilities,
an outstanding perseverance of strength,
with wings that never grow tired,
and a soul that never becomes weak.

God is love,
holding you,
in the palm of His hands,
where He whispers to your soul,
how much He loves you!

God is Love

 

 

The brightest light

The Brightest Light

The batteries of my flashlight are empty,
and the wood is too wet to make a fire.
The dry ground became muddy from the rain.
The slippery roads don’t hold my feet.
As the darkness is closing in, I shout,
“Can you hear me?
Can you help me?
Please, safe me”!
With a panic-stricken heart, I try to focus.
“Don’t panic”, I say, “God-child don’t lose your calmth”.
As I bring back the beatings of my heart to a normal pace,
I use my knowledge as my most powerful weapon.
And in the dark silent mud I whisper, “Love”.

The more I whisper the one word I know,
darkness retreats,
driven away by a beam of light.
Following the light to find its source,
the light has made a home in my heart,
where my deeds create the greatest beams,
and my thoughts drive away any kind of evil.

The Voice of Love and Light speaks to me,
“My child, in order to find the light in the darkness,
you only need to look inside your heart,
where I am.
Always present, giving strength, sharing wisdom.
Knowledge is your torch in the darkness,
your heart is the calmth in the rushing storm,
but love is your most powerful weapon,
for love is the brightest light that I can give you”.

The brightest light

 “This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you”.
(John 15:12, the Holy Bible)

Family

Family

Family is not genetic,
but defined by a bond,
that goes deeper than the heart.

 Family is friendship,
where souls connect in dimensions,
invisible for human eyes.

 A love for one another,
that transcends the mind,
as if all thoughts collapse,
and all your worries die.
Where strange is a normality,
weird the basis of your understanding,
and crazy the norm in your reality.

 Love is not a question,
but an answer to trust.
Where truth is a foundation,
a house build on love.
Where love is the beginning and the end,
and our acts the deeds we believe in.

Family is not a word,
No, it is a feeling,
an emotion,
our soul’s desire.
Family is the heart,
where we live and breathe in.

family

You know how much I love You

You know how much I love You

How can I describe my feelings?
How can I describe the contents of my heart?
When I look at You all logics fade,
and my heart pounds like that of an antelope,
who only just escaped a hungry lion.
The world disappears from my sight,
for my eyes can only perceive You –
nothing else matters to me but You.
If only You would know how much I love You!
My heart languishes for You,
in the brief moments when You are not with me,
I cannot exist without You by my side.
Still I know that I am one of many,
still I understand that I have to know my place.
But when You ask me,
if I love You more than others?
Then yes Lord, You know how much I do,
You know how much I love You!

You know how much I love You

“The third time Jesus said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?”
Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.”

John 21: 17

A beacon in the night

A beacon in the night

In a hardened world,
a leopard better hunts alone,
if he wants food before the night falls.

How is it then,
that the leopard dies of hunger,
and the pride of lions eat their meal?

Together is better than alone,
for a multitude of eyes see more,
than one single set alone.

Once rejected,
it is difficult to find your way,
your place back in the pride.
But the victory is for those,
who don’t give up.

Remember that I AM,
always by your side.
I pave the way for the weak,
and I support the crushed in spirit.

Unable to snatch you,
out of my loving hands,
the flowers will never fall,
and the grass will never wither.

My love is your beacon in the night,
a lamp that shines before your feet,
and the embrace that holds you up.

Before the night falls,
the light will remove the darkness,
so that the night will never fall again.

A beacon in the night

 

 

Worship

Worship

Love is a heart on fire,
where passion colors the soul red.
Inextinguishable is the joy,
of a heart that knows how to love.

When Your hands hold me,
I feel safe enough to let my guard down.
Comfortable in my own skin
I play in a pool of  shallow water,
where amusement makes me sing.

Wherever I go,
You are with me.
Wherever I am,
You hold me tight.
Wherever I was,
is simply forgotten –
forgiven is the heart that lives in love.

You are my passion.

You are my anchor in the storm.

Your light guides me home.

Worship is simply a love song.

 

 

 

Under the chuppah

For two nights in a row, I received a vision. The vision showed me a wedding. I was looking through the eyes of the bride. Her face covered with a veil, my sight was through that veil. White chairs on each side, with an aisle in the middle. The wedding took place on a grassland surrounded with trees, as if it was a secluded garden. At the end of the aisle I saw a man in a nice black suit but I couldn’t see his face. I knew he was the groom, because nobody was sitting on the seats and besides us, there was nobody there. The groom was standing underneath a beautiful white chuppah, dressed with white roses. Those same white roses where in a bouquet that I was holding in my hands. The wedding was about to start. And as soon as the image came, it left me.

Today I turned this vision into a poem. Before I started many bible verses came to mind that allowed me to understand the vision better. The bible verse that described the vision best is Isaiah 62:5, which says,

“As a young man marries a young woman, so will your Builder marry you; as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you”.

After this, I looked into the chuppah. In my vision I saw it clearly and I was curious if there was a special meaning to it. During my research I discovered that the chuppah symbolizes so many different things. It was so interesting to read. What stood out to me was the following. The groom enter’s the chuppah first, which symbolises his ownership over the home (the chuppah also symbolises a home) on behalf of the couple. When the bride enters the chuppah, it is as though the groom is proving her with shelter or clothing. With this he publicly demonstrates his new responsibilities towards her.

The reason this stood out to me is because it symbolises our relationship with God so beautifully. When we give our lives/hearts to God, we marry Him in a way. It is as if God is waiting for us under the chuppah and as we (the bride) enter the chuppah, God publicly demonstrates to all living things that He is now responsible for us. It deepens our bond with Him. It connects us to Him on so many different levels. God loves us so much.

I hope this makes any sense to you but if it doesn’t, take the poem as you read it. Let it find a way into your heart and find your own meaning in the words. Because that is the beauty about poetry, it can be read in so many different ways. This is mine and I am so curious….what is yours?

Enjoy the poem (in the picture)

Under the chuppah

Lost is the heart that falls in love

lost is the heart that falls in love

Truth be told, I have never written about love in the sence of being in love. Since I find the subject rather difficult and the subjects ‘Faith’ and ‘Life’ a lot easier, I avoid it all together. But yesterday I made an attempt to put something on paper. So here it is and I need your honest opinion. Please leave one in the comment section below. I love to hear from you!