Author Archives: Gineke van Keulen

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About Gineke van Keulen

Creative writer with a main focus on poetry, but also interested in other forms of writing! I write to inspire people, and to bring a little bit of joy into their lives! For inspiration I don't just use my own life and thoughts, I also enjoy storytelling. On the side, I enjoy art and photography, which is also a great inspiration source for my writings! I hope you will enjoy my work as much as I enjoy writing it!

Look Up!

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It is a peaceful Sunday afternoon. Or at least, it should be peaceful! My mind is racing, my heart is pounding, and I cannot breathe.

I know what is happening. I need to run! I need to flee! I need to get out of here! I can tell that my dad is worried, but I do not want to bother him with my feelings. It will only make him worried. My dad does not say anything. He is good at that sort of thing. He just listens and somehow picks up sentences between the lines, I never even said. And yet, this time, he puts a little pressure on me. Enough to make me tell him in an outburst of desperation that I am not ok. I feel alone, afraid, and I have been feeling as if something bad is going to happen for weeks now. I do not know why. I do not know how. And yes, I am probably imagining things, but I do not know what to do anymore. It feels as if my life is at stake, and there is nothing I can do to make things better.

My bike is in the shed. I grab it and start my way to the park. The wind is in my face, and my feeling of not being able to breath intensifies. I feel my chest tighten. My legs are burning, most likely from the fybromyalgia but at the moment I cannot be certain. I am in blind panic. I want to scream. To the Heavens and to myself, but who will listen? I have already said so many prayers, but I am still in the same state of fear that I was in years ago. Life feels hopeless. I keep cycling and when I arrive at the park, I quickly drop my bike at the nearest parking area. Blindly I walk into the park. I do not know where, but I must find a place to breathe!

The trees are changing colors ever so gently. Many trees are still green, but the first yellow leaves are waiting to fall, and the first trees with red leaves proudly show off their colors. I keep walking. I keep breathing. In four counts, out four counts. Until suddenly I hear a voice from deep inside my heart. It is not my own voice or my own thoughts, but a voice independent from mine. A guardian? An Angel? Or even the voice of God? The words pierce through my heart, “Sometimes, all you have to do, is look up!” With tears burning in my eyes, I direct my gaze up. I see branches with green leaves, and behind it, the white clouds like a sea of light. I feel the presence of God inside of me. It is everywhere! My heart takes a slower pace, and the fear and panic disappear. The storm that was raging has calmed down. I find a bench and sit down. For the first time in weeks, I feel calm.

The song from the Casting Crowns, ‘Only Jesus’, starts playing in my head. It does not stop. But it is exactly what I need! Only Jesus. Only Jesus can calm the storm inside of me. Only Jesus can take away the fear, grieve, and pain. Only Jesus can fill me with a love that is lasting and true. Only Jesus can find me when I push away everyone else. Only Jesus! Only Jesus! Only Jesus! On this bench, in this park, with its beautiful colors, it is only Jesus that has been able to calm me down.

In this moment I realize that I should speak up more about how I feel! I should open up to my loved ones more often if I feel like drowning. God places people in our lives to help us on our journey, but during the entire course of my life, I have been trying to do it alone! Me and God against the world! But that is not the way God meant it! I am allowed to open up, and ask people to help me, pray for, and comfort me! I don’t have to do this life alone!

We all need people in our life, and that is the exact reason, I wanted to share this personal story of mine! I want to ask you to look around you. In your own life, community, and circle of friends, there are those who feel like they are drowning! All they need is for someone to see them, to hear them, to comfort them. I know life is busy, but I also know that it does not have to take long. Please let them know that you are there! Do not let them drown in their own feelings and thoughts, but reach out your hand, and hold them tight! We all feel alone from time to time. We all need a friend! Remember that!

This photo was made by, and is property of, Gineke van Keulen Do not use without permission! Thank you!

Vanished on the Eastern Wind

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The sound of bagpipes,
echo between the mountains,
forcing breath into my lungs.
I gasp a silent prayer,
while waiting for the armies,
to find my broken bones,
in a pile of ash.
My golden ring shimmers,
in the pile of black dust,
and I wonder,
when it got lost.
When did life fall apart like this?
When did my name,
vanish on the eastern wind?
My heart longs for life,
but between the fire of guns,
I wait for God to find,
the remainder of my self.
A butterfly flutters softly,
caries daisies in her hands,
and I see the light of the sun,
like a warm September afternoon,
embrace my shattered heart.
Here in the arms of Love,
between nails of blood,
I find compassion,
in its finest form,
and a place,
to call my home!

I wrote this poem as a dedication to all the innocent victims of war throughout the ages!
With love, Gineke.

Welcome Change!

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Emptying
everything that once was
to make place
for everything
that is to come.
A free mind
and a free heart
allow new friendships
and new love
to enter
into an old home
that is perfectly
cleaned out.
With arms wide open
I welcome you in
With a heart
filled with expectations
I welcome change!

All the poems written on the blog belong to Gineke van Keulen. If you want to use it, please ask permission, or give her credit. Thank you!

When Memories are Made

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You are only young once!
something you only realize,
when you are old enough to understand,
there is no going back.
Tears mix with laughter,
as memories flood my mind,
presenting themselves like photographs,
yellow and almost falling apart.
Time has gone by so fast,
and only now, I wish, I could turn it back.
People have come and gone.
I would give the world,
to see them one more time!
On my grandfather’s knee,
or next to my dad eating nectarines,
while having a picknick on the grass.
I would give everything to see,
my mom laugh one more time!
The essence of gratitude,
is knowing that once a memory is made,
it never really comes back.

Written by: Gineke van Keulen
Written today: 20 July 2024

When Miracles Happen

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Inside a shell,
a pearl grows.

Inside a cocon,
a butterfly is born.

Deep within the earth,
gold is formed.

The point is,
in order for beauty,
to take shape in your life,
you have to face the darkness.

For when you struggle the hardest,
the greatest miracles happen.

When the Light seems so far away,
it is actually all around you.

Written by: Gineke van Keulen
Written on: 17 July 2024
Please ask before using any of my work.
Thank you!

In a Sea of Love

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Almonds in milk.

softness comes from the heart,

seeps into the skin,

and grows like a rose,

on a beautiful summer day.

Ice Cream in cones,

the cold melts in the sun,

when love is revealed,

and spreads like ivy,

all across the world.

In a sea of love,

no mountain can stand,

darkness fades in the light,

and the cactus flower blooms,

for one whole night.

All the poetry on this page belongs to Gineke van Keulen. Ask before using! Thank you!

Gentleness of Life

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I feel the wind

gently brushing my hair,

and the sun on my skin,

warming my soul,

from the outside in.

I feel content,

sitting here,

by myself,

with the city sounds,

playing in the background.

I feel a love,

deep in my heart,

that deepens,

with each moment.

I feel connected,

more than ever before,

to God,

and to myself.

I want to be here,

in this place,

where I embrace,

the gentleness of life.

Then I realize,

for the first time,

this is what peace,

feels like!

This poem, and all the other poetry on this website, belong to me; Gineke van Keulen. Please ask before using, or give me credit. Thank you!

An Explosion of Joy

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Different hues of pink,
flow from my heart,
onto a white canvas,
where it meets,
dances,
and creates,
a new natural world,
with yellow and green.
An explosion of love,
where joy bursts,
like spring flowers,
out into the air.
Where it breathes,
moves,
and feels,
the happiness,
that so far,
always remained inside.
Out of control,
this happiness flows,
out of my hands,
onto a canvas,
where it finds a place,
to shine brightly,
in a dark world,
that is slowly coming,
out of winter.
An explosion of joy,
is what my heart,
had to give,
and in that explosion,
I find a smile,
waiting for me,
every time,
I look at my canvas!

The photo above is from a painting that I created about a week ago. It was my first attempt at pouring art, and it turned out great. I am so happy with the result, and I love looking at it. It is acrylics on canvas, and it is called ‘An Explosion of Joy’, just like the poem. So, the poem I shared today is based on the painting and on the painting process, and I hope you enjoy both! Again, when you want to share my work, please ask, or give me the credit. And maybe good to share as well is that the painting is not for sale! Have a lovely day! Thank you!

When Her Heart Opens Up

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The heart that opens up,
to the word around her,
allowing the wind to blow,
through the curtains of her window,
is able to embrace love,
when it presents itself at her doorstep.
Full of joy she opens her arms,
recognizing kindness,
when it presents itself.
She buys flowers,
and puts them on her table,
and bakes a cake to share with friends.
She laughs in freedom,
and speaks her mind,
when someone asks her a question.
Unafraid she presents herself,
to a world so different than her own.
She has faith in her Creator
and awaits His presence full of love,
and when He comes,
she presents to Him the same woman,
she has presented to everyone else.
Her soul blooms in the knowledge,
that someone loved her,
before the world ever could.
She does not hold on to rejection,
but finds peace in her temporary solitude,
relying on God to provide,
new and exciting adventures for her life.
When the heart opens up,
trust is able to find peace,
in a world so fickle in her being,
because she belongs to God,
who carries her in His hands,
and bring her more love,
than any human being ever could.

This poem and image (as well as all the other work you find on this page) belongs to me, Gineke van Keulen. If you want to use or share it, please ask first, or give me credit, Thank you!

The Rosary

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Sitting at Your feet,
You braid my hair like a laurel wreath,
while the rosary is in my hands.
I sing a song on the breath of a nightingale,
until a small bird falls asleep in my lap.

A waterfall of pure light,
covers me in Your sweet kisses,
where Your love covers me with laughter.
The sweet joyful sound,
that comes from deep within my heart,
awakens the rainbow-colored butterflies.

My head rests against Your chest,
where I hear the soft beating of Your heart.
The soft fabric of Your robe comforts me,
like a blanket against the bitter cold.
Your arms are my deepest safety,
where I am guarded like a precious pearl.

Your words of wisdom nestle in my soul,
where it builds golden castles on a green meadow.
We run between the daisies,
as I hold on tightly to my rosary,
and my giggles blend with the scent of roses.

A gift is a memory of love,
that reminds you of the giver.
As I softly fall asleep on Your lap,
the rosary is still in my hands,
where I keep it as a memory,
of You.

Thank you for reading my poem today! I truly appreciate it, that you took the time to read my work. Once again, thank you! It takes time and effort to write these words. The poems are a piece of my own heart and soul, so I would appreciate it, if you would either ask for permission if you want to share my work, my poems, or give me credit! Thank you very much! Have a lovely day!