The heart that knows how to love

Sometimes, or should I say often, I express myself better in poetry. Because my heart has this melody that is best expressed in music. And poetry is the only way of writing, where a melody is able to meet the words.


The heart that knows how to love

The pearl always hides inside the shell.
In order to find the beauty within,
you have to search inside the heart,
where the diamond is hidden for the world.
Only those with a pure heart will find it.
But those whose heart is destructive,
they will find nothing at all.

One does not run towards a lion.
A cat is not merely a ragdoll.
In order to get close to an elephant,
you have to learn to gain his trust.
In order to catch a butterfly with your hands,
you have to learn the art of patience.

A heart that has been hurt is easily hurt again.
A heart filled with fear will never learn how to trust.
The ability to accept without expectation is a treasure.
It is a pearl in the hands of a loving God.
The one who accepts the broken soul,
has understood the deepest essence of love.

An open heart receives with pleasure.
An open mind has found eternal joy.
True love is only found inside a conscious heart.
A conscious heart is only found inside your love.
In order to love you have to know love itself,
and understand what love has done for you.

In His arms I find my safety,
in His love my greatest miracle.
In His joy I find my laughter,
in His heart I find eternal happiness.
Who can rob me out of His presence?
Who can hurt me in His sight?

My soul is a pearl inside a shell,
protect by a lighthouse against the storm.
Who but Love itself will see the beauty inside of me?
Who will give a broken shell a chance?
I still believe in the power of a miracle,
I still believe in the heart that knows how to love.

The changing of the hour

This weekend we are turning the clock one hour back. The days are officially getting shorter, and slowly winter is approaching. But not yet, because autumn is still here in all his glory. I love autumn. The changing of the colors, leaves slowly falling down, candles are being lit again and somehow life becomes a little bit cozier. Or as we famously say in Dutch, ‘gezellig’.

This entire change reminded me of a poem that I wrote a year ago. It was autumn and the hour was going back in a couple of weeks and I felt as restless as I do today. I was impatient. Impatient to get started with my work for God. But God gave me a dream to let me know that I was still early. It wasn’t His time yet.

In fact I was so eager to start working, that I ignored God’s message and decided to get up early anyway, to start my days writer more than I did at the time. It was my plan to wake up at 7 am, whereas I usually woke up at 8 am or 8.30 am. Planning my days with chores and writing, I was set to begin my new regime. Ready to go, I set my alarm clock at 7 and went to sleep. It must have been November by that time. But when I woke up the next morning my alarm clock hadn’t sounded. I was 100% certain that I did set the alarm because I checked at least three times the night before! I didn’t wake up during the night either. That’s when I got a vision. I saw in my vision, that Jesus entered my room. He walk straight to my alarm clock and turned it off. After He turned it off, He gave me a kiss on my forehead and left. It wasn’t until a few months later that I realized, that not only did He turn off my alarm clock, His power also broke it down. My clock still functions perfectly, my alarm clock however just won’t budge. And my alarm clock stopped working after the morning that Jesus turned it off!

It was clear to me. I simply had to wait, no matter how difficult that was going to be. As all of this took place, I wrote a poem. The poem is about my deep love for the autumn season. But it is also about having to wait. We have to sit out the present season in our life, before the next season will begin. And sometimes that is really difficult. You are ready to move on, but the problems in your life simply won’t leave. You are ready to start a new career but nobody will take you on. You are ready to sell your house and start a new life elsewhere but your house doesn’t sell. Whatever it is, you are unable to move forward in your life. And that is difficult. It is as if you have to wait for the clock to change the hour. You stare at the pointers in the hope that they will go a little faster, if you just stare at it long enough. But slowly the minutes are ticking away. And frustrating is not helping you either! The clock isn’t changing the hour one minute faster if you get angry.

The only thing that really helps is taking your eyes off the clock. Focus on something else, temporarily. It is just like waiting in a waiting room at the doctor. What do you do until the doctor calls you in? You get a magazine and you read a little. Because time passes by much quicker if you focus on something other than the clock. In the same way, we have to switch our focus to something else in order to wait for God’s perfect timing. If we move to fast, things might go wrong and we can ruin God’s plan with us completely. Besides, God won’t budge anyway, and I can tell you that out of personal experience. If God wants you to wait, He will let you wait in whatever form or fashion, He sees fit.

Our impatience is a stumbling block in our way, but if we try to have patience, God might surprise us in a way, we could never have seen coming. Patience gives the opportunity to learn new lessons and see new things. If we would never have to wait, life would simply pass us by. We would never see the leaves changing color. We would never smell the sweet scent of cinnamon. We would never witness the beauty of a sunset. Patience is a life changer and an eye opener!

Here is the poem:

Early autumn

The chestnuts fall wherever they want.
Acorns lose their hats in the process.
The maple collects its juice for the next harvest.
A squirrel hides his food in the grand old oak.
Unshakable is the tree that bears her fruit.

The cinnamon apples spread their warm perfume.
Sweet is the scent that melts my heart.
The autumn sky embraces the strong cold winds,
but the fire in the hearth keeps me warm.

When the honey sweetens the hot liquid,
the words of my heart are kind.
Now the green leaves fall down,
and in the raked pile I make snow angels.
Joyful is the heart that reminds itself to be young.

In expectation of the winter I look at You,
but the clock hasn’t moved the hour yet.
Impatient is the heart that tries to hurry.
In time the feet will triple over themselves.
The lesson of patience is an impatient one.

At the kitchen table I drink my tea,
as You fill my head with happy memories.
And in the warmth of Your touch,
I learn to embrace the blessings,
of an early autumn.

 

 

Love never fails!

In the world today we experience many expectations and convictions. On television, social media, work and in our own hearts. It doesn’t really matter where we are or who we interact with. We either expect something from others or from ourselves.

Expectations aren’t a bad thing in itself. Our personal expectations can be a goal we want to pursue, a dream we want to establish or a change we want to make in our life. In that sense an expectation or a goal can be a good thing. But often we go too far in our expectations. We create many expectations for ourselves. In our looks, work, behavior, financial status. And we are willing to go through great lengths to get there. Even if it means that we have to hurt ourselves!

Also the people we meet aren’t save from our expectations. We meet someone and instantly create a perfect image of this person in our minds that they will simply have to live up to. When they don’t, we are disappointed. Then expectations so easily turn into convictions, for they are not as we think they should be! And that is wrong in our own point of view.

But wouldn’t the world be a better place if we limited our expectations and our judgment? Wouldn’t it be better if we changed our point of view to one of love?  Jesus said, “Love each other as I have loved you”. And Jesus died on a cross because He loved the world so much! He gave His life up so we could have a life in Heaven!

The apostle Paul explained love perfectly saying, “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.”

The answer to our expectations and convictions is love. Love one another as Jesus loved you! Treat them as you would want them to treat you. It doesn’t matter whether someone is rich or poor, healthy or sick, black or white, male or female, gay, straight or transgender, etc.. Jesus didn’t ask to make expectations of people or to judge them. He simply asked us to love them.

Love doesn’t mean that you have to be best friends and share a cup of coffee once a week. No, it simply means that you respect and accept others the way they are and treat them with dignity and respect! If we drop our expectations of ourselves and others, we get room to breathe, room to grow and room to prosper. And all because we chose to love!

May God shine His love over you and give you peace!

 

Take a breath!

I am in desperate need of rest and peace. My mind is going on and on without intermission. I feel the pressure of expectations weigh on me, like a huge boulder, in every aspect of my life. My heart is racing and my breath is getting shallower as if I am running a race in a too long marathon. I am out of breath and ready for a well needed break. But I am my greatest problem. I can’t say no. I cannot stand up for myself. I am insecure, afraid of what people might think. The pressure I put on myself is immense. To be perfect or not to be perfect that’s the question. That’s the dilemma. And through this all I hear God say, “I love you so much, regardless of what you do”. But it is like an echo in the distance. I desperately try to hold on to His light, but it fades in the darkness of my own expectations. In this world today I know that I am not the only one.  The deep desire to be this perfect girl, to please everyone, is becoming too much for me. But if the answer is so simple, to simply say, “No”, then why is it so hard for me to choose that?

My whole life I have had the feeling of having to prove myself. Not just to my family, friends, teachers, church and God, but also to myself. Making friends has always been hard for me and I have been rejected by people too often. And every single time I think that I am over the past, it hits me in the face. Too much has happened for me to be open and outgoing. My personality has changed with the waves, beating against my ocean shore. But I do not want to dwell in the past. I refuse to dwell in the laughter, the comments and the rejection that I was forced to face. Yet still it affects my life today. I am filled with fear. Fear of people disliking me or what I do. But their opinion isn’t important. This is about my own happiness. This is about me being able to be happy. Focussing on my weaknesses is not going to make me feel better, but focussing on my strengths is. I should be allowed to love myself. It should be illegal for me to hate myself for the things I am not good at. But that is life. Life throws your weaknesses in your face and tells you that you are not good enough. I need a break.

A break from my weakness would be a welcome escape and yet it is haunting me like a ghost in a long-ago abandoned house. How do I escape? And the same answer is back in my face. Just say no! Focus on your strengths instead of your weaknesses. It is so simple and yet so difficult. Because admitting that you are weak is losing your face. It is like standing naked in front a big crowd, bare and exposed. Giving people a reason to dislike you and that was exactly the fear I began with. In life we are asked to do things we are not good at and we force ourselves to do a perfect job at it. At least I do. Instead of being proud of of trying to become better at something that I’m not good at, I feel the noose around my neck tighten until all the air is sucked out of my lungs and I am in full panic mode. I know my strengths and weaknesses but I don’t like to be confronted with my weaknesses all the time. All I have to say is, “No”. Instead I walk away with my soul in my arms, rocking myself to sleep. Hoping then I find peace. Then in the midst of my distress I hear a soft whisper that says, “It is braver to say no and admit that you are weak, than to be brave behind a steel mask”.

The storm in my mind finally comes to a screeching halt. The waves beating against my heart come to rest and silence fills my soul. Rest and peace fill me up until my cup overflows. The love of God is not asking me to do what I am not good at yet, so I will be better. The love of God is telling me that I am good the way I am. Unimportant it is to be perfect. Important it is to be the perfect version of how God created you. God created mankind in His image. He created me as a unique being with my own talents. What I can do is something that others cannot and what others can do is something that I cannot do. We are all uniquely made. I may not be good at organizing events, speaking in front of people or leading a group of people. But I am good at helping people, writing and listening. Saying no at times…is proclaiming who you are. And when you are proclaiming who you are, you are proclaiming who God made you to be. And that is something, you can be proud of. When God loves me, I can happily be who I am, in His image, as His unique masterpiece, even when I have to admit that I am not good at some things.

Now…I can finally…take a breath!

Freedom of religion

In today’s world it is all about the self. It is something like a quest to become to ultimate person that you can be. An adventure to become the perfect version of yourself through mindfulness and spiritual living. And something about that bothers me.

Spirituality probably means something different for me than for you. For me, spirituality is the fear of naming exactly what you believe in. In other words, one believes there is something but what that something is, is a bit unclear, however, it is centered inside yourself. To me, spirituality is something vague. Something I cannot grasp. Like a thick fog that you try to materialize. And it focuses only on the self. The self is you as a person. You focus on yourself and what is inside yourself and you try to make that perfect.
Now there is a fine line between religion and spirituality to me. Where a religious person is more or less spiritual, a spiritual person is not religious. It is a confusing matter that I will most likely never truly understand.

Personally I believe in God the Father – Creator of Heaven and earth, God of Israel – Jesus Christ – Son of God, Savior of the world – and the Holy Spirit. Because I believe in this, I call myself a christian and therefore I am religious. I believe that God is always with me and lives in my heart, so inside of me, as the Holy Spirit. Because I believe this, I am Spiritual. I believe in something inside myself. However I can name what I believe in so I am not spiritual but religious.
Spiritual people believe there is something…a God…something they call the universe, but what exactly it is remains a bit vague. It is not like they believe in the planets or the solar systems but they don’t believe in God as in Jesus either. No wait, that is not entirely true because they believe Jesus was a great teacher. But not the Son of God. This universe is inside of themselves like an energy. An energy you can influence with a bit of work. (This is what I understand so far with the information that I found!)

First of all, I have absolutely nothing against spiritual people. I believe we have all been given a choice in life and it is not op to me to judge your choice. Jesus said, “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you” (Matthew 7:1-2) So it is better not to judge at all. Besides Jesus also said, “Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (John 3:34-35). Jesus did not exclude certain groups of people from His love. With Jesus everyone is welcome. The same should be with us (christians), we should love regardless of who it is, standing in front of you. This is exactly what I try to do each day. And I will be honest enough to say that I do not always succeed in that.

So why bring this up?

Well the reason I start about the fine line between religious and spiritual people is, because in recent years I noticed a lot of “hate” against religious people. Every single time there was a terrorist attack, the blame was given to religious people, because somehow all religious people are bad. Read Facebook only. Just scroll down to the comment section underneath a news message and there are enough people claiming that it is the fault of religion. If religions would not exist, we would live in a world of peace, they say (at least in Holland they do). Because of this, I have noticed a shift. People are turning towards spirituality to believe in something. Spiritualism is on the rise. I cannot say with 100% confidence that this is out of fear, but the blame towards religions has something to do with it, I believe.

But why is a religion so bad? Not every person on this earth is the same! People act from the heart and every heart is sinful. There is not one person on this planet that has never made one mistake. We all do. We all screw up at times. This is not because we are religious but because we are human. It is the same with people who commit terroristic attacks. They act, not out of religion, but because their heart is evil. Religion has nothing to do with it.

So why is there such a negative outlook on religions. It is an answer I cannot give. It is a matter that I don’t understand either. But one thing I do know! I am not going to stop believing in whatever I want to believe. It is my choice to believe in Jesus as the Son of God. Just as I respect people who do not believe in Jesus, I expect the same respect back!

It is the same with Jewish people. Just look at how much they are persecuted because of being Jewish! It is outrageous! Not all Jewish people are the same! Yes some may make very poor choices in life, but many are friendly and kind. Strong people who try to live their faith/religion in peace. And yet they have to pay the price for it daily.

Why can we not accept and respect people regardless of what they believe? Why do we all have to become afraid of our religion? I believe in a freedom of religion. In a freedom to believe the way you want to believe. But that can only happen if we learn to treat people with dignity and respect. I also believe in a freedom of religion for the entire world. In Holland I am not so much bothered with being a christian but in so many other countries there are christians who have to meet in secret. If they get caught, they can either face jail or death. And the law in that country often states death.

Let us fight for peace! Let us fight for freedom of religion or spirituality or whatever it is you believe in. In order to establish peace, we first have to learn to love, because only love creates peace. Treat people with love regardless of what they look like or believe in. Everybody deserves to be loved. But that love starts with ourselves. We cannot make other people behave differently, but through our behavior and deeds we can make a difference.

Like I said, I have nothing against spirituality but I hope that in the future, we do not have to turn to spirituality in order to believe in something. I hope it will not become a mask of fear. Spirituality is a beautiful thing but so is religion. And whether we understand each other or not, let us always meet each other with love and kindness.

From the heart

On the news this afternoon I saw a piece about the Rohingya refugees. Unicef called for help because so many children in camps in Bangladesh are hungry, traumatized, sick and alone. In the footage they showed, I saw a long line of children. They all had a cup or a plate in their hands and a small portion of food was scooped on it for every child. This one particular little girl begged for a little more. Even though she was given a little, she was immediately pushed away. The helplessness in her eyes touched my heart. All she wanted was food but there was simply not enough to give her. Not even enough for one more scoop. This reminded me of a poem I wrote a couple of years ago.

When I wrote this poem, I had also seen similar footage on TV. I don’t know from which organization this was but that doesn’t matter! In the footage I saw back then, there was a little boy. Same conditions but then in Africa, I believe. The look in his eyes touched my heart so much that I immediately wrote a poem about him. And not just about him but about all the children around the world who are suffering. Whether it is from hunger, sickness, trauma or loneliness, there are too many children still suffering around the world. And not just children, but adults and elderly too. So many people who are living in totally different circumstances than me and you. For a while I worked for an organization called ‘TEAR’. This is an organization that fights poverty. My work was mainly administration but it felt so rewarding.

The reward is the help that you give people. Even if it is just a small gift, it makes a great difference. For a while I felt that my administration work didn’t matter that much, because I wasn’t helping anyone hands on. But little by little I started to see the difference my small contribution made. Today it is my dream and deepest wish to help people through my writings. It is the only prayer that I hope God will answer for me one day. Because when I see these children, my heart goes out to them and I wish that I could do so much more than I am able to do today!

Here is the poem I wrote:

Unanswered

 Your eyes,
pierce through my flesh,
like burning arrows.
I feel your pain,
and my eyes shed the tears,
that you cannot give.
In a moment of despair,
my heart breaks.
To read is unnecessary.
Prevention too late.
For your eyes,
scream the questions,
left unanswered.

Hope, I call you!
Compassion, where have you gone?
Give me the names,
of the helpless hands,
the eyes that closed,
and the mouth that didn’t speak.
For the Heavens cry,
and the angels shout,
but nobody heard,
nobody answered.

Bless the soul that sees,
bless the hero that helps,
but glory to Him,
who answers the prayers,
and leaves the selfish,
unanswered.

A personal kind of love

This morning someone responded to one of my instagram posts with the words, “Just wanted to let you know that you are loved”. Truth be told, I didn’t realize how much I needed to hear that. To be fully honest with you, I don’t always love myself. For the past week, God has been telling me, He loves me on numerous occasions, this being one of them. I believe Him! I really do. It’s just that I lack love for myself sometimes.

Let me explain myself a little more. Ever since I was little, I wanted to do the things I did perfect. If it didn’t work out, I would tell myself that I failed. This became such a struggle for me, that when I did one of my final internships, my internship supervisor set me apart. She told me, “There is one word that I do not have in my dictionary and that is failure. So I want you to stop using that word. You are not a failure! Yes, sometimes things just don’t work out but that does not mean that you failed. It only means that you have to try again until it does work out”. These words were (the way Oprah Winfrey calls it so beautifully) an AHA-moment for me. Nobody had ever told me this, the way she did. In fact I sat there (18 years old) with my jaw dropped and unable to say anything. Up to this day, those words are always somewhere in my mind, especially when I feel like a failure again. It works like an echo.

Even though I have been working on not calling myself a failure, I am still very hard on myself. In a way I am my own worst critic. I make it so hard on myself at times that I cannot live up to my own expectations. I know that God the Father loves me, Jesus loves me, my parents love me, but I just don’t always love myself. And in these moments of ‘self chastisement’, it is really difficult to see the love of God and also that of my loved ones. Because I live with my parents, I feel a high responsibility for them. As a way to pay for cost and accommodation I help my mom in the housekeeping. Since my mom has rheum and unable to do that much, I force myself to do everything. I work so hard that at times I feel completely exhausted, but even then I am forcing myself to do it anyway. Giving up is simply not an option. And I don’t communicate anything! Even when my parents ask me about it, I force myself not to make such a big deal about it. I can do this!

Also with God I am very critical about myself. Often I feel like, I have to be perfect. No mistake is allowed to be made. As a writer, as a poet and as a human being, I feel the need to make God proud of me. To make God love me. Yesterday I heard the voice of God the Father in my heart saying, “I love you regardless of what you do”. Even though I know this, I find it very hard to truly believe this. It is weird, I know. Through my life God has showed me and told me so incredibly much. Much more than I have told you so far, but the downside is that it puts a lot of pressure on me. As much as I want to do, I often feel unable to. And when I am unable to, I am very hard on myself. At the end I feel worthless, which is only bringing me down. The other day, as I woke up, I heard Jesus voice and He said, “I love you, just remember that”. I needed that.
Knowing that God loves me and that He is trying to help me, makes me feel humble, because often I feel like I don’t deserve it.

The reason I am telling you all this is, because I know that many people in this world feel the same way as I do. We ask so much of ourselves, thinking that God will love us just a little bit more if we work a little bit harder. We are our own worst critic and it is not lifting us up, it is bringing us down and wearing us out. All we need to remember is that Jesus loves us! The Father loves us, regardless of what we do!!! But yes, it is often easier said than done. However, I believe that through prayer and hard work we can overcome this. All I have to do, as Jesus said, is remind myself of His love for me. Every single time again, until my heart surrenders and accepts it. There is nothing we can do to make Him love us more and there is nothing we can do to gain a better place in Heaven! His love is enough!

There is this one song by Andrew Peterson called ‘Be kind to yourself’ that speaks to me a lot. He wrote it for his daughter, I believe, but everytime I hear it, it feels like God wrote that song for me. In the song there is this sentence that says; Gotta learn to love your enemies too. (In order to listen to the song, go to Youtube. It is easy to find) Whenever I hear this line, I think about myself. If I am my own worst critic, if I lack so much self love, than I have to learn to love myself too. Because if God thinks I am worth it, than I am! He loves me, so what good reason do I have to hate myself?

 

Life is a classroom

Every now and then God gives me small pieces of wisdom, short poems and other messages. I treasure these words a lot. To me they are like diamonds, valuable and rare. On my Facebook, Twitter and Instagram page I share these pieces of wisdom because I believe that they can also be very valuable to you. Today I shared this one:

God our Teacher

Life can be difficult at times. In times of trials we often ask why God would allow bad things to happen in our lives. Things like a disease, poverty, divorce, losing a loved one or depression can not only take us by surprise but it can also shake our world as we know it. After I finished my study ‘Health Care’, after many trials and tribulations, I was only working for about a month, when I discovered that I had fybromyalgia. My rheumatologist made the diagnoses short and simple (in his eyes that is). He said, “Well, you do have fybromyalgia (like the general practitioner already predicted) and I have good and bad news. Good news is that, even though it is chronic, you can live a relatively normal life with it. Bad news is that if you keep on working as a nurse, you will be in a wheelchair by the age of 30”. Remember that I was only 20 years old when I heard this! I was all alone in that examination room! All the plans I had made for my life, just flew out the window.
All my life I wanted to help people and make them feel better. As a nurse I thought I could do that. It was something that fit me. But the diagnoses was like a huge earthquake that tumbled everything upside down. The following years would become a journey to search for a new purpose in life.

Looking back I was not looking for a new purpose but for an old one. Looking back I can safely say that God used fybromyalgia to bring me back to writing. Everything that happened in my life was God working towards His purpose with me. It wasn’t always easy. My life was a difficult journey that at one point at age 21, made me almost commit suicide. But God is a strong, powerful and loving Father, who does not give up that easily. God the Father took me by the hand and at age 25 brought me back to my calling. He brought me back to writing and reminded me of Jesus words to me, “How about a book”? Of course I didn’t understand how I could help people through writing immediately, but little by little I started to see a bigger picture. I am only 31 years old now, and many things are still unclear to me. But as life goes on, all the puzzle pieces will fall into place. Rome wasn’t build in one day and just like that you cannot learn all your lessons in life in one single moment. God uses all the years we get to teach us all about Him, His love for us and what our purpose in this life is. God takes His time to teach us the tricks of the trade, because love is patience grown by time.

If you see life as one big classroom and Jesus as your Teacher, you will come to understand that the internships and exams and nothing other than the trials and tribulations we experience in life. Remember what James said in James 1:12, “Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him”. And I guarantee you that it is worth the effort. Heaven is the best reward Jesus could ever give you! So don’t give up, take the internships and exams. Listen to your Teacher, Jesus Christ. And get that diploma! It is worth the effort!

All I ever wanted…

All I ever wanted.

All I ever wanted is,
to give my heart and soul to you.
All I ever wanted is,
to do the best job I can do.
All I want to give to you,
my life and so much more,
But after all the earthy setbacks,
Father, I am not so sure.

Everything I ever did,
has turned to sandy dessert dust.
Everything I ever tried,
and I’m still having to adjust.
After every one of my attempts,
what is there that I can give you?
I am standing here with empty hands,
there is nothing more that I can do.

The mission that You gave to me,
I feel is desperately failing,
And even though I fight so hard,
all my heart can do is wailing.
Father, I don’t want to give it up.
but all my weary eyes can see,
is not You, my dearest Abba,
but the friendly people fighting me.

All I ever want to give You,
is everything that You deserve,
But Abba Father help me,
to find the way for me to serve.
Forgive the friendly people,
and keep them in a warm embrace,
because all I ever wanted them to see,
is Your hope and everlasting grace!

This poem, a prayer, I wrote around the age of 25/26 years old, shortly after I started writing again. And sometimes I still feel this way. As a daughter of God called to a life of serving Him, it is not always easy to persevere. There are so many times when you feel like giving up. In these moments of doubt, confusion and frustration, prayer is so important! You know, God understands these moments of doubt. Both God the Father and Jesus do. Remember how Jesus was in the garden of Gethsemane and He prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” (Matthew 26:39) Even Jesus, in His deep fear, went straight to His Father for help. Just like Jesus we may bring our helplessness to the Father in prayer! We may lift our troubles up in prayer in the great knowledge that God will help us through the power of the Holy Spirit! Often when I am feeling weak, I also feel the Holy Spirit very close to me, encouraging me to move forward despite my fear and doubts.

Ever since I was a little girl I was touched by a part of Matthew 28. The part I am talking about is, ‘Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”(Matthew 28:18-20) Every single time I heard these verses, even as a little girl, I had the chills running down my spine, fire blazing in my heart and the deep desire to put these words of Jesus into practice. Whenever I am feeling afraid and doubtful, these verses help me out a lot. This is exactly why I keep on moving forward. This is exactly why I haven’t given up. Poetry is such a beautiful way to bring people closer to Jesus, the Father and the Holy Spirit! It is my way of putting Matthew 28:18-20 into practice. It is my gift back to God!

The essence of love

When I woke up this morning, I heard Jesus say, “I love you, just remember that”. These sweet words brought a smile to my face. It made me so happy that I wanted to share some love with you. So I digged in my manuscript to find some love. After a short search this poem, that God gave me, caught my attention. I wrote ‘The essence of love’ quite a few months ago. It is a bit long but I hope you love it nonetheless! And I hope it will give you a bit of the love and joy that I felt this morning!

The essence of love

In the essence of love,
hearts can be broken.
In the heart of kindness,
souls can be used.
How do you prevent,
the rain to fall down?
How do you prevent,
the sun to shine?
Nature runs its course,
the human heart its own desires.
How do you stop a bird from flying?

In the essence of love,
tears are shed in pain,
yet also in heartfelt joy.
When two people run a race,
there can only be one winner.
A divided soul is shaped in fear,
a place where questions rule the mind.
The race demands your full attention,
therefore focus only on one thing.
Chose right from wrong,
good from evil,
love from hate,
and your heart will win the race,
your soul will win the prize.

In the essence of love,
every day is valued,
every lesson appreciated,
every question answered.
Those who are willing to listen,
will learn the answers to life’s questions.
Life is like a school,
the human being is its student,
Jesus her loving teacher.
Lessons are not learned in one day,
yet every day provides a piece,
to life’s hardest jigsaw puzzles.

In the essence of love,
love is a precious gift,
shared with the world.
Every life is unique,
valued is every soul,
the earth shelters.
Let not a single judgment,
come across your lips,
nor one accusation,
cross your mind,
for equality rules the human race.
If not even God chooses,
between one and the other,
but loves every living creature,
why then do you dare to choose?

In the essence of love,
life is a shared gift,
a lesson learned,
an emotion felt.
The gift God gives you is life,
the ability to love,
and to share it with the world.
When God is love,
and through the love of Jesus,
you are in God,
then the essence of love,
is to simply live life,
with love.