Nail it on that cross!

A flower growing between the cold stone rocks –
in temperatures that reach far below zero,
and where even the animals do not choose to live,
still survives on the strength within,
that searches for life in the midst of an expected death,
that is who I really am!

It is not the hope or the love that forces me to go on,
but the ever-present reluctancy to give up.
A faith that lives deep inside of me,
tells me everyday that there has got to be more.
More than this endless suffering,
more than this heart-wrenching pain,
that forces my pillow to catch my tears in the night,
and my soul to hide them during the day.

A Force that is bigger than all of this –
bigger than our entire universe,
is what the last piece of my heart holds onto.
All I hope for is that this Force,
takes my pain and nails it on that cross,
where it can die along with my tears,
to restore the hope,
born from love,
that establishes a fountain of joy,
within every corner of my heart!

The white tiger

Regal and Majestic,
the white tiger roams the jungle,
looking for that one thing he needs.
Unable to accept the patience,
he so desperately needs,
he allows the green leaves,
to scratch his coat,
leaving a trail of cotton wool behind.
His impatience forces him,
to make mistakes,
he otherwise would not make.
The only way to his destination,
is by waiting in the shadows,
for that one prey,
and that one opportunity.
White tigers are hunters,
who know what they do,
but just like the white tiger,
we can fail to camouflage ourselves,
in the shadows of the jungle,
and miss our most important meal of the day!
But when we learn,
to lay low in the bushes,
of this jungle of life,
in complete patience and focus,
we will reach our target,
faster than we could ever imagine.

Patience is a virtue,
not easily learned,
but too important,
to miss out on.

From the Ashes

From the Ashes

Sometimes it is a miracle,
that the cracked house still stands.
Exfoliated paint has dimmed,
the always lively outer walls.
Crumbled wall joints have given,
the luxury estate a poor appearance.
The door hangs in the frame,
showing the many break ins,
this house has had to endure,
and when entering,
the emptiness proves the robberies,
of this dilapidated mansion.
Antique pink walls hint the past,
of parties with women in fancy dresses,
drinking champagne and cocktails,
whose spirits now haunt,
this desolated, empty place.
Where have they gone, I wonder?

A painting falls down the wall,
one from the baroque period,
that surprisingly still shows,
every detail of the painters work.
I am lost in this castle,
with its empty spaces and walls,
and the many cobwebs,
covering the ceiling –
even the spiders have left.
There is nothing left for me,
and a little bird on the window sill,
tells me it is time to leave.

Against all the voice,
telling me to say goodbye,
there is one asking me to stay,
for even a house in this broken state,
has a chance of coming back to life.

Love is a force,
with unbreakable strength,
that can make a flower bloom,
in the middle of the winter.
When you collect this force,
that is deep within your heart,
miracles will begin to happen,
and even an old dilapidated house,
can arise from its ashes!

Soar

Soar,

My lips are painful and dry, as if I have been walking, through the desert for weeks. Now I am longing for streams of water, surrounding my body and soul. For the wind to lift me up, and give me wings like angels, so I can rise above myself – to see myself from a new perspective, if only these glasses were helping me! I spend my days in meditation, where a continuous flow of words, makes her way from my heart to yours. Gratitude is what I always learned, but now I am longing for more, because I feel that I am ready, to open my heart and fly, out of this desert into the promised land, I am ready to soar!

Roots

Roots

Roots dig deep,
at the rivershore,
laying a firm foundation,
for the old cottage.
The water rises,
the wind blows through the trees,
bowing and breaking the branches,
but the roots do not give in.
As the sun sets behind the horizon,
the country roads become dark,
and the foxes come out of their holes to play,
still the roots protect the house,
for whatever is built on love,
will never fall,
and whoever relies,
on this firm foundation,
will find goodness,
for the rest of his life.

A Lesson in Strength

A Lesson in Strength

A storm in a glass of water,
maybe that was all I had to endure,
but for me it was a tornado,
a giant flood overwhelming me.
I needed the world to stop,
for my life to come to a halt.
I needed panic to take me over,
and fear to pierce a way through my heart.

In order for us to become stronger,
we first have to become weaker.
For strength can only enter our soul,
if it defeats all the negative inside us,
and diminishes our fears and doubts.
When the mind grows stronger,
it allows our faith to grow,
so we can learn to trust ourselves.
Like a seed in the dark earth,
first has to die,
in order to bloom in its brightest colors,
that is how our dark hearts,
first has to die inside of us,
in order to become strong and invincible.
When we are willing to face our fear,
we are able to defeat them in the battle.
If we are willing to work on ourselves,
the victory of self-growth will be ours.
The lesson of strength,
has been the most valuable in my life,
for it has taught me,
that when you do not give up,
anything is possible.
The key is to put one foot in front of the other,
to breathe one breath at the time,
to force your heart to keep on beating,
when the darkness seems to engulf you.
But the greatest help in this process,
was a man on a cross,
who rose from the dead,
and who believed in me,
long before I did.
The road to pure strength,
goes through deep dark valleys,
and over high mountains,
but at the end of the road,
the prize of self-love,
understanding, wisdom, and confidence,
is worth everything!

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Photo: taken by myself at a bamboo forest in France in 2014!

When the heart burns

When the heart burns

Every step I take,
my empty heart burns,
like a forest on fire.
Trying to rescue life,
in all its forms,
I make a decision,
to fight.

The sun on the horizon,
promises me hope,
but how can I believe,
in a new land,
when the old one,
is still burning?

Letting go of sorrow,
feels like the end,
of my very last breath,
overwhelming me with fear,
until I decide,
to breathe again.

Every step I take,
my empty heart burns,
so lay it on the ground,
to find life without it,
but how can I live,
without my heart?

Every season,
teaches us lessons,
but this season appears,
the hardest of them all,
so I have to believe,
that the lesson of this season,
will be the biggest one,
I have ever learned.

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Photograph made by: Gineke van Keulen!

 

The Road of Self-Discovery

The road of self-discovery

The end of the bowl is in sight,
when I eat the last of my grapes.
With the juice still on my lips,
I meditate on the sweet taste,
lingering in the corners of my mind.

Every memory is a treasure at heart,
where growth is gently formed,
in the deep core of perseverance.
Whether we like it or not,
every moment in life is a learning process,
where we learn more about ourselves.

Fear is not the master of our faith,
nor is grieve the root for our future.
We overcome the darkest facets of ourselves,
when confrontation is not avoided,
but embraced with a heart of understanding.

To understand who we really are,
is understanding who God really is,
and wants to be inside of us.
The strength, wisdom and beauty,
that we pray for every single day,
is already present in our souls.

When we search for the treasures,
the gifts that God has hidden inside of us,
we learn that strength is always present,
that beauty is something we already possess,
and that wisdom is a tangible element of who we are.

In every aspect of our life,
gratitude is the only answer,
and love the only motivation,
we should be looking for.

The road of self-diiscovery

 

 

 

The brightest light

The Brightest Light

The batteries of my flashlight are empty,
and the wood is too wet to make a fire.
The dry ground became muddy from the rain.
The slippery roads don’t hold my feet.
As the darkness is closing in, I shout,
“Can you hear me?
Can you help me?
Please, safe me”!
With a panic-stricken heart, I try to focus.
“Don’t panic”, I say, “God-child don’t lose your calmth”.
As I bring back the beatings of my heart to a normal pace,
I use my knowledge as my most powerful weapon.
And in the dark silent mud I whisper, “Love”.

The more I whisper the one word I know,
darkness retreats,
driven away by a beam of light.
Following the light to find its source,
the light has made a home in my heart,
where my deeds create the greatest beams,
and my thoughts drive away any kind of evil.

The Voice of Love and Light speaks to me,
“My child, in order to find the light in the darkness,
you only need to look inside your heart,
where I am.
Always present, giving strength, sharing wisdom.
Knowledge is your torch in the darkness,
your heart is the calmth in the rushing storm,
but love is your most powerful weapon,
for love is the brightest light that I can give you”.

The brightest light

 

Redemption

Redemption

On a wild chase,
the city lost me,
and the only escape,
leads me down the stairs,
of a dark subway station.

Descending the stairs,
I find you,
and your curious sympathy,
touches me.

 Movement runs fast,
in fear it is uncontrollable,
but your steps are premeditated,
and your motions are effortless.

Unafraid is your heart,
diligent your observation.

A little white-blue bird you are,
resting in the palm of my hand.

As you fly away on the wind,
my fingertips turn into a smile,
the sign of your everlasting redemption.